2012 Chat /BS Thread

[cmann250]

At the airport in Cheyenne, WY a cowboy, an Arab man, and a Native American man sit waiting for a flight. The cowboy has his feet kicked up on his bag taking a nap while the other two strike up a conversation. The Native American man says, "Once my people were many and now my people are few. Once this whole contintent belonged to us." To that the Islamic man replied, "My people were once persecuted. Were were once few and now we are many." The cowboy had overheard all of this. He tipped back his hat and said, "That's because we haven't played Cowboys and Muslims yet."

[skilletky]

A lot of you will probably find this just plain dumb, but I laugh at this every time I watch it. If you haven't seen it, the audio is a guy that got really drunk of messed up on acid apparently

http://certifiedrandom.com/videos/drink ... -cups/2194

[bmoeller]

Funny if you're drunk, I guess....................

[bmoeller]

Dear Santa,
How are you? How is Mrs. Claus? I hope everyone, from the
reindeer to the elves, is fine. I have been a very good boy this year. I
would like an X-Box 360 with Call of Duty IV and an iPhone 4 for
Christmas. I hope you remember that come Christmas Day.
Merry Christmas,
Timmy Jones
* *

Dear Timmy,
Thank you for you letter. Mrs. Claus, the reindeer and the elves are all
fine and thank you for asking about them. Santa is a little worried all the
time you spend playing video games and texting. Santa wouldn’t want you to
get fat. Since you have indeed been a good boy, I think I’ll bring you
something you can go outside and play with.*
Merry Christmas,*
Santa Claus***
* *
Mr. Claus,
Seeing that I have fulfilled the “naughty vs. Nice” contract,
set by you I might add, I feel confident that you can see your way clear to
granting me what I have asked for. I certainly wouldn’t want to turn this
joyous season into one of litigation. Also, don’t you think that a jibe at
my weight coming from an overweight man who goes out once a year is a bit
trite?
Respectfully,
Tim Jones
* *

Mr. Jones,
While I have acknowledged you have met the “nice” criteria,
need I remind you that your Christmas list is a request and in no way is it
a guarantee of services provided. Should you wish to pursue legal action,
well that is your right. Please know, however, that my attorney’s have been
on retainer ever since the Burgermeister Meisterburger incident and will be
more than happy to take you on in open court. Additionally, the exercise I
alluded to will not only improve your health, but also improve your social
skills and potentially help clear up a complexion that looks like the
bottom of the Burger King fry bin most days.
Very Truly Yours,
S Claus
* *

Now look here Fat Man,
I told you what I want and I expect you to bring it. I was
attempting to be polite about this but you brought my looks and my friends
into this. Now you just be disrespecting me. I’m about to tweet my boys
and we’re gonna be waiting for your fat ass and I’m taking my game console,
my game, my phone, and whatever else I want. WHAT EVER I WANT, MAN!
T-Bone
* *

Listen Pizza Face,
Seriously??? You think a dude that breaks into every house in the world on
one night and never gets caught sweats a skinny G-banger wannabe? “He sees
you when you’re sleeping; He knows when you’re awake”. Sound familiar,
genius? You know what kind of resources I have at my disposal. I got your
sthi wired, Jack. I go all around the world and see ways to hurt people
that if I described them right now, you’d throw up your Totino’s pizza roll
all over the carpet of your mom’s basement. You’re not getting what you
asked for, but I’m still stopping by your crib to stomp a mud hole in
you’re ass and then walk it dry. Chew on that, Petunia.
S Clizzy
* *

Dear Santa,
Bring me whatever you see fit. I’ll appreciate anything.
Timmy
* *

Timmy,
That’s what I thought you little bastard.
Santa

[dazedandconfused]

Thats about the way kids think it works. What the hell has happened to the world?

[Mark Nixon]

Between that video above, BMoeller's posting, and goings on at CompD, it's been a pretty enlightening, yet hilarious, morning.
On the video, I truly have dealt with people 1 on 1 that I SWEAR are spitting out the same random, deranged ramblings that dude was. Eerie as hell. And these people are considered "functioning".

Thats about the way kids think it works. What the hell has happened to the world?

Cut and dried? Liberalism is what has made people lazy.
So, now everyone wants a free ride guaranteed to them and no one wants to use true blue honesty anymore, because it flies in the face of "The Coddling Doctrine", where no one loses, everyone is "special" and you can't point out a person's flaws or insult them.

Mark.

[cmann250]

Between that video above, BMoeller's posting, and goings on at CompD, it's been a pretty enlightening, yet hilarious, morning.

I don't know the other fellow on CompD, but I have a question for him.



I've had 2 or 3 deals with Mark and they all have been fine. I don't even remember how long I sat on that Getrag that I traded to him. It didn't really matter to me. I had the time and space, it was convienient, so I helped a guy out.

I get a kick out of that section of CompD, but it's the same people that like to drag stuff in there over and over. It's grade A entertainment though.

[ellis93]

Link to tread please!

[PToombs]

After reading Calebs version of that time honored pun, I see political correctness has reached our youth, and ruined a great racist joke.

Bryan, that was good!

[cmann250]

After reading Calebs version of that time honored pun, I see political correctness has reached our youth, and ruined a great racist joke.

I talk a good game The interweb is a scary place, you never know who is watching

[Mark Nixon]

I talk a good game The interweb is a scary place, you never know who is watching

Watch your phones, don't mind the clicks, scratches or bleeps, that's just amateur wiretappers.
It's when all is nice, quiet, and crystal clear that you should get worried about the Black Helicopters and Government Dodge Chargers out front.

Mark.

[ellis93]

Y'all are just crazy,"they" don't care about us peons. Go get a spray tan and learn some Spanish,then go buy some of the semi autos that obamas selling,then you'll be on the radar.....oh wait.....they can't even keep up with you then

[Mark Nixon]

...I've had 2 or 3 deals with Mark and they all have been fine. I don't even remember how long I sat on that Getrag that I traded to him. It didn't really matter to me. I had the time and space, it was convienient, so I helped a guy out.

I get a kick out of that section of CompD, but it's the same people that like to drag stuff in there over and over. It's grade A entertainment though.

I missed this part of your commentary.

I saw Alex Hale was blowing his ass off over there, about me being pissed about a transfer case deal he reneged on a while back.
Too bad he has no class and wouldn't even return phone calls.
Just like Chris Snyder, he hid when it came time to finalize the deal, but unlike Chris Snyder, he DIDN'T actually phuck me out of any money.
'Course, I didn't give him the chance to defraud me like he did his college on the PTO covers, or like Longhorn359 who used my FedEx account fraudulently.

Mark.

[oldestof11]

You piss off a lot of people.

I know both parties and had dealings with both. Both are stand up men.

[CumminsPower59]

Found a whole donor for my 91 for only $700! It's not perfect by any means, but it's not a rotbox like the 91 is now. Hopefully, if road conditions improve around here tomorrow, I can go get it...